Forgiveness opens and heals the heart. It brings it back into the wonderful receptive state that it is intended to be in.
It is easy for us to allow our ego to build walls around our injuries and take our wounding from others to epic proportions never allowing us to forgive. If you close your heart and cut yourself off from spirit by focusing on your own wounds you will suffer.
I have spent many years studying forgiveness and why it is so hard for people to forgive. What I have found is that people have a hidden fear. Most people feel that the injury they incurred, the wounding they felt was deserved. This is really the secret cause preventing us from moving back into forgiveness.
What you really need to do to truly move into forgiveness is recognize that no one deserves to be treated in an injurious or harmful way. Usually when someone does lash out they are not even conscious of you, they are just in so much pain you happen to be the target because you’re there.
The key is for you to hold enough self-love and know that you are a magnificent spiritual being. Know that you are lovable and loved. If you know these things then you won’t take offense when someone is behaving unkindly. You’ll be able to recognize that it’s not about you and if it is for some reason about you, you’ll be quicker to say, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.”
If you act like a victim and feel that the world is coming at you in a way that you don’t deserve, it will cripple you. It will cause damage to you mentally, physically and emotionally. It will bring you down and disempowers you greater than any other decision you can make.
When you forgive, you free yourself of all negative ties to everyone. It really begins with forgiving yourself. It’s alright to make mistakes we are all spiritual beings having a human experience. When we make a mistake, and forgive our self for it we are calling upon our own divine nature.
We need to look at our mistakes as a learning experience. It’s important to remember we all do the best we can at the time in our current level of consciousness. When we are angry and lash out we are cut off from our spirit, our life force. We are totally in our ego just acting out of fear.
When others injure you, no matter how horrible their acts they were simply doing the best they knew how to do in their current level of consciousness. In most cases their anger had nothing really to do with you.
If you’re are having trouble forgiving here are a few questions to ask yourself that can help:
Who are you angry with and what resentments are you holding towards them? How long has it been since you communicated with those who you resent? In what way might you be responsible for the part you played in the separation between you? What decisions can you make that might have been better than the ones you made in the past?
It’s alright to be angry but you must understand the function of anger. The function of anger is not to lash out but rather it is to say, “stop, no more.” When you are angry, stop and ask yourself what part of you is saying “stop” and what do you want to stop? When you recognize what it is that needs to stop then anger has served its function.
It’s not that we need to get over our anger rather we need to embrace it as a messenger. It’s telling us that something is out of balance in our life. It could be a judgement, a behavior, or some dynamic that needs to come to an end.
What can you learn from your anger? Can you and are you willing to forgive yourself and those that harmed you to get your life force back?
Look at those people who have caused you pain and injury and ask, what gifts can you find in your interactions with them? What did you learn, gain, or walk away with that has served and benefited you or will help you even by default in your life?
Forgiveness brings life force back into your body and allows all wounding to begin to heal. No injury is worth holding on to because it takes you away from life.
